Ati Nurbaiti, The Jakarta Post, Jakarta
So many hands shot up in the air across the ballroom. So many questions on the basics of life and existence, and too little time.
"How do I get a divorce if my husband left me without documents?"
"Is it true that a birth certificate states if the child is illegitimate?"
"Why does the man get two thirds of the inheritance and the woman only one-third?"
"There are so many among us returning from Saudi Arabia without having been paid, where can we get help from?"
Some 2,000 women from eight provinces have gathered in Jakarta since Monday for the second national forum of women heads of household (Pekka).
They are widows, divorcees, single mothers, wives of missing or permanently ill husbands.
The women represent almost 400 groups from Greater Jakarta, West and Central Java, Aceh, North Maluku, East and West Nusa Tenggara and West Kalimantan.
On Tuesday the panelists on the second day of the gathering, held once every three years, were only able to answer a few of the questions.
Regarding inheritance, Azriana from the National Commission on Violence Against Women said Islam encourages consultation.
The principle that men get two-thirds of the inheritance refers back to Arab culture in the time of the Prophet Muhammad, she said, when the men carried the sole responsibility to support the household.
"In our case the women often work much more than the men," she said.
Outside the forum venue at the Grand Cempaka Hotel in Central Jakarta was a bazaar with handicrafts and snacks made by the women's groups.
Pekka was set up in 2001 with the assistance of the National Women's Rights Commission.
Its mission is to help "women who are out of sight and silent amidst discrimination and violence", according to commission head Kamala Chandrakirana, in her introduction to the book Dunia tanpa suami (A world without husbands).
Throughout the country, there are estimated to be more than six million women heads of household. Pekka currently only has 8,273 members.
Pekka is led by Nani Zulminarni, who says she has been asked how a widow like her can lead a national organization.
Among the delegates at the forum in Jakarta are 60 women from East Nusa Tenggara, one of Indonesia's poorest provinces.
Bema Soge Buli, a participant from Larantuka in the province, said she joined Pekka following the death of her husband, who passed away at the age of 43.
She said he left her with five children.
Pekka members cite the advantage of being able to take loans from the organization for their small businesses.
Bema said her Pekka group has accumulated some Rp 2 billion, from which members can borrow a few million rupiah at low interest.
She said some men in her area were getting jealous.
Quoting the sub-district head, she said with a smile, "You're widows, but you're rich widows."
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